Peeking at Peter
So I've returned from New York, still sick and only partly frozen (well maybe a bit more than partly). It was freaking cold! So cold, you questioned your sanity about going out in the first place. I, however, am not really sane.
Friday Night
Plane lands at 6:10 pm, take a step out of the airport and feel my blood start turning to ice. Get a cab that was driven by Usuma Bin Laden's brother, and begin fighting the traffic of Rush hour. Now for those of you that have never been to New York, or have never rode in a NYC cab, the rules are simple. NEVER LOOK OUT THE FRONT WINDOW. The site is enough to scare even a stunt man. So while weaving in and out of traffic, cutting off busses, cars, and the occasional bike I noticed I was freezing. I asked Mohammad (that was the name on his displayed license) if he could turn the heat on. "I am sorry my friend, the heat is broke". So I shivered as we cut across Central Park and finally arrived at the Holiday Inn on West 57th street. This area is also known as Hell's Kitchen. It's a few blocks from the theater district and Times Square.
I only had a few minutes to check in and then take off for the comedy club. So check in, drop off the stuff, and head out of the lobby to hail one more cab. This driver....I'll call him Yesmon. The reason....whatever you asked him, he would say..."Yes, Mon!" Take me to Jersey (where the comedy club was located)! "Yes, Mon!" "Don't take me through the Holland Tunnel!" "Yes, Mon!" So of course...he took me through the Holland tunnel. I hate the Holland tunnel as when you go through it during rush hour, you get stuck under ground. Knowing that the water is above my head is bad enough. Breathing all the automobile exhaust that is in the tunnel bothers me even worse. Add to it that I am still sick, and my voice is pretty much trashed. We finally get to the club 40 minutes later (and nearly $50 in cab fare).
The shows were pretty sparse...with a lot of no shows. The weather kept most people from coming. It was 2 degrees out with a wind chill of -20 degrees. The audience did give me sympathy as my voice was beginning to go. I explained that I was really sick, and as the audience all went "awww" I chimed in..."No I'm really sick. Like in Beaches. When Barbara Hershey coughs, you just know it's over. But I'm taking care of myself..." and I light up a cigarette (ironic...since I don't smoke).
Good audience, and I applaud them all for braving the cold. I of course, froze my noogies off waiting for the bus to take me back to Manhattan. I really thought I was going to freeze to death. I could see the papers now. Gay Popsicle Found in Jersey. You could put a sign around my neck that says "Eat Me!"
Bus finally came and dropped me off at the Port Authority Station. I hailed a cab from there. Got back to the room and turned on the individual heating controls to 85. Dreamed that I was in hell, but at least I was warm.
Saturday
So back to Manhattan...to shop! I've got nothing else to do now, so why not. Walk into Macy's Men's store and there is a line about 30 people long buying scarves, hats and gloves. I pick up a scarf, ear muffs, and gloves and walk to a different section to pay for them. Warmer now...I head down to the village for a little additional shopping. Buy two shirts at this one place and then have a pancake lunch at this place called "DOMO". $3.95...who says you can't eat cheap in NYC? Spend a little time working my way back to the subway, stopping in stores to warm up as the wind is so damn cold. The Starbucks has a poor girl working with a winter coat on. The tempature in the place was a balmy 55 degrees. She said the heater was working at it's maximum, but the windows were leaking too much cold air.
Had dinner at the Bubba Gump Shrimp Company in Times Square. I hate Times Square, as it is so damn touristy. And even more, I hate tourist trap restaurants...but when you are sick, the closer to the hotel...the better. Needless to say, the BBQ burger I had...well I couldn't really taste it, so I guess it was good.
Got a call from Angelo, a friend of a friend, saying that he and his Partner would be at the Angus restaurant and bar, which was across from the Phantom of the Opera's Theater. Angelo's partner Mike works as a production manager for Thoroughly Modern Millie on Broadway. I sit at the table with them, as actor upon actor walks by. I'm introduced to Kate Buddeke who is playing Mazeppa in Gypsy.
I look at the next table and I see the man I had a crush on all through high school. This is the man I was destined to be with (at least that was what I though at the age of 15).
Matthew Broderick
So the whole conversation at our table, I am desperately trying to get a good glimpse at this man. As he finishes his meal, he gets up and walks to the bathroom. I make my excuse at the table and race across the restaurant following him. He is standing at the urinal, so I stand at the urinal next to him. I look upwards, thinking..."This is a horrible way to meet someone", and can't think of anything to say. Now "Bad Patrick" tells me to take a peek, while "Good Patrick" tells me I should keep my eyes on the road. I give in, and sneak a peek at Matthew's Broderick's Peter. Ladies and gentlemen, what I wouldn't have done for a camera phone at that moment! What I can say...shower...not a grower!
The rest if the trip was a blur. I'm still sick as a dog, and my voice is completely gone. I wrapped in blankets all day Sunday, but I do have some pictures I will post later this evening.
